I punched a shark, right in his stupid stinky shark face.
We’re still bros. He knew he was being a dick.
This is genuinely the second Windows post I’ve made! Why? Fucking Windows 8.
I’m confused and discombobulated and just….ugh, not with it. Thanks for this PiC! It’s okay, I still love you, mostly. But you invited this shit. I am in my own bum.
You had to wait because I somehow engaged the ‘features’ screen and couldn’t navigate away from it! Even with Escape. Why does the escape button not work? Fuck you, Microsoft and your bullshit buttons or soft keys or wank holes! I will shit in your mouth! Suck arse.
Windows 8 is like the 2012 Red Sox. Perhaps a good idea on paper, but a complete mindfuck in reality.
Start button! Where the holy fuck is my start button??!! *cries*
(it took 33 days to post this update because the start screen activated for no reason, [like a sentient Decepticon robot cock master who would like to ruin my life] and it has taken me this long to get back here. I am a prisoner of my own devices!
When you are the empathetic type, be sure the person who is sobbing- that you are offering a tissue to- isn’t a completely batshit-crazy tiny racist Thai woman who continually asserts that SHE’S NOT CHINESE!
Otherwise, you will have to sit through her tirade about how her boss is an (adjective) cunt. The epithets and racism will continue to come, no matter how uncomfortable you try to make yourself look. Apparently, being a young, friendly, white woman is a license for someone to go crazy with the bigotry. Awesome.
This isn’t the first time this has happened to you…
Learn from your mistakes. Sheezus.
This is what Google spat out when I searched ‘tiny racist’…seriously.
Okay, let me start with this, I f*cking LOVE food.
This could be exotically spicy Tom Yum Talay OR
Reconstituted Cat Vomit
These could be Tender and Succulent Chiken Satay Skewers OR
Premature FaceHuggers waiting for their moment to pounce
This could be the Chef’s Own Special Saag Lamb OR
Proof of Life on Uranus