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Frozen World

Fuck poker


Where they grow these mushrooms, I don’t know, but I reckon that place warrants a visit.

Really, Netflix? Reeeeeallly??

Conversations with mum (midnight showing)

Mum: I think I want to see the Avengers movie.

Me:  Avengers?? You mean X-men?

Mum: Yeah, sure that. They were doing a cheap midnight showing here but I can’t do that any more.

Me: Why?

Mum: Because I fall asleep.

Me: You fall asleep?  You pay $10 to go to the cinema and fall asleep?  So, when’s the last time you paid for a nap?

Mum:  When I went and saw the last Harry Potter film with your uncle.

Me: If you were there with him, why didn’t he wake you up?

Mum: I think he was embarrassed because he fell asleep too and didn’t want to say anything.

Me: [uncontrollable laughter]


Mind dump…

Things are taking a turn. Stay tuned. More bullshit to come.

South Croydon Station

Announcement on the 23.40 to Caterham- ‘I would like to remind those who have had a very good night that there is a VERY large step down to the platform. Mind that gap party people, mind that gap.’

yes he will…


The platypus will come…


Oh yes he will.


Oh yes she does.



(or whatever the noise a triumphant platypus makes)

rude laydeegub


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